BDSM Training: How To Pull Your Partner’s Hair

Hair pulling is a significant BDSM control and bondage tactic for most dominants. You improve by gaining control over the sub’s behavior and using various bondage styles. Pulling your partner’s hair proves efficient in gaining control during most BDSM plays.

So, what is hair-pulling in the context of BDSM?

Hair pulling is a subtle gesture during sex where one partner pulls the other partner’s hair to express desire and possessiveness. When used correctly, hair pulling lets the sub surrender to their Dom in BDSM relationships. Hair-pulling brings the sub to a world of pleasure as the Dom gains a sense of possessiveness and control.

Pulling your partner’s hair during sex gets extensive use, even for non-BDSM partners. This is because both men and women pull their partners’ hair as sexual pleasure intensifies.

Is hair pulling for everyone?

Just like other BDSM techniques and plays, some people will love hair pulling while others don’t. Before you practice hair pulling with your partner, you must check with them first. You might include it in the BDSM contract, which will help you understand what your partner finds off-limit or acceptable; always discuss your limits (details see here). Don’t just pull their hair without knowing how they will react. If your partner enjoys it, you may learn how to pull their hair during sex correctly.

If you want to find out how to pull your partner’s hair correctly as a form of BDSM bondage and control technique, keep reading as we take you through the tricks.

8 Tips: How Do You Pull a Woman’s Hair Properly

Remember also to master the technique of proper hair pulling to guarantee pleasure and satisfaction to your partner. Otherwise, doing it wrongly might contribute to a significant turn-off for a BDSM scene. Follow this guide when pulling your partner’s hair.

1. Get consent from your partner. 

The number one rule before engaging in any BDSM activity will be getting consent from your partner. So, if your partner agrees with hair pulling, you may proceed with this activity. Madeline Cooper, a sex therapist, agrees that if both parties agree on a move, it will not spike guilt or negativity from either of the participants. The consent should be from free will so that both parties derive pleasure from the experience.

2. Set clear boundaries and physical limits before engaging in hair pulling.

If you pull hair wrongly, you may remove or cut it off. Therefore, before you embark on the hair-pulling activity as a form of BDSM, you need to set clear boundaries and limits on how to do it. Your partner must feel free to say no in the extremities or use a safe word or sign when they think their hair is pulled too tight or wrongly. 

When we pull hair, the neck and head must get involved. So, if you pull the hair wrongly, the neck or even the head might sustain some injuries. So, before pulling your partner’s hair, ensure they feel comfortable and hair pulling is done with care.

3. Always pull hair from the back.

Like other BDSM plays and activities, you must master pulling hair during a BDSM scene. Hair growing on the side or the front proves painful and easy to pull out when pulled. So, never pull the hair on the side or at the front, but instead, pull hair from the back. Focus on a big chunk of hair at the back for safe hair pulling. You don’t want to cause excessive pain or hair damage to your partner by pulling hair in the front or sides.

4. Always make sure you start slow and pull the hair consistently.

When performing BDSM plays, you should always start slow and gain consistency as the pace increases. For example, when pulling your partner’s hair, you must begin slowly, especially if they are new to BDSM. A loose grip allows you to gauge your partner’s interests and limits. It might be tempting to jerk your partner’s hair quickly but ensure you start slow and give them room to get used. 

Also, consider including other playful acts to lessen the impact of hair-pulling. For instance, try to kiss or gently bite them on their neck between hair-pulling grips. The in-between play breaks help ease the experience giving you a relaxed sexual experience. So, when practicing hair pulling, remember always to start slow and remain consistent as you increase the pace slowly.

5. Pull the hair from the base.

The scalp comes with many nerve endings. Pulling hair close to the scalp increases the pleasure, and your partner will enjoy the hair-pulling experience. However, pulling from the ends or tips may hurt your partner and not cause a pleasurable experience. Also, pulling hair from the tips causes pain in the nerve endings, making it less enjoyable.

So, when pulling hair, start from the bottom, and close to the scalp.

6. Grab a lot of hair

Hair pulling requires you to grab a big chunk of hair and not less. Less hair tends to feel painful compared to when pulling plenty of it. Use your hands as a wide comp and grab much hair from close to the scalp, especially if your partner has long hair. When practicing hair pulling with Sir M, slave L enjoys it more if he grabs plenty of hair in a ponytail design starting from the base. It feels more comfortable than if he was to pull small chunks of hair. For short hair, you will need to grasp as much hair from the base as possible.

7. Remember to often check on your partner.

As a Dom, you don’t want to get lost in finding your pleasure while forgetting the sub. The sub takes all the BDSM plays and bondage activities in submission and service to guarantee your satisfaction. Therefore, you must check on them often and ensure they feel comfortable with any BDSM activity you indulge in.

Make it a norm to ask your partner how they want the hair to be pulled without killing the vibe or mood. If your partner feels free to communicate and express how they want things done in BDSM, you will enjoy the relationship more. So, often check on your partner and create a free atmosphere where no one feels unconsidered or pressured.

8. Incorporate hair-pulling with other BDSM plays

Any BDSM activity will become more fun when incorporated with other BDSM plays. Kinky pleasure products like sex toys intensify hair-pulling pleasure for most couples. Hair pulling proves exciting when combined with breath play and pain-intensifying plays. Some sex plays and toys that increase satisfaction when hair pulling includes:

• Handcuffs. Handcuffing and hair pulling may be an incredible turn-on for bondage plays. If you want to read more about how to use handcuffs during sex safely, feel free to read some more here.  
• Blindfolding. Blindfolding adds some curiosity to a BDSM scene. If you surprisingly pull your partner’s hair after blindfolding, it makes the experience more pleasurable.
• Flogging. Flogging opens the brain to concentrate on other body parts amidst hair pulling. In addition, hair pulling keeps the nerves alert, as some slight floggings in a BDSM play.

Why Do I Love Hair Pulling? (slave Lisa)

I have enjoyed hair pulling from Sir M for years due to the following reasons:

 

• I find hair-pulling a romantic gesture.
• Hair pulling makes you enjoy sex more.
• Hair pulling fits perfectly as a BDSM bondage technique.
• Each time hair is pulled, the brain releases a reward hormone that makes sex more enjoyable.
• It adds some drama to one’s sex life.
• Hair pulling proves an ideal form of displaying dominance and control.
• Hair pulling makes an addictive sexual habit that causes arousal to both parties involved.

 

Related Questions

Is pulling your partner’s hair a form of rough sex?

Rough sex makes one of the most enjoyed forms of sex. Most people find rough sex a significant turn-on with partners who pull the hair during sex favorites. In BDSM, not only does hair pulling prove rough sex, but it also signifies dominance and control. Many bondage styles in a BDSM scene will involve hair pulling.

Can hair pull cause damage?

Hair pulling in a sex scene must get done with utmost care and expertise. You need to pull hair from the base in huge chunks. Also, when pulling long hair, do so from the back and not the front or sides. Wrongly pulling hair might cause a painful experience or damage to the hair follicles if you happen to pull it off. You might also injure the scalp and cause a non-pleasurable experience for your partner.

Final Thought

In BDSM relationships, hair pulling proves a significant turn-on and pleasuring experience. When you have a partner who enjoys hair pulling, you must work on the tips to make it pleasurable. Sometimes, when hair pulling gets done wrongly, the receiver may develop a negative response. So, you must work on setting limits, developing safe signs, performing hair-pulling correctly, and incorporating other BDSM plays. If you do it perfectly, hair pulling might add to another must-have experience in your sex life.